Freakin' Fundamentalists

"Two faces have I
One that laughs one that cries
One says hello one says goodbye
One does things I don't understand
Makes me feel like half a man"

         - Bruce Springsteen, "Two Faces"

Regardless of what Barack Obama may have said four years ago in that famous speech of his at the 2004 Democratic Convention, there definitely are two Americas - two diametrically opposed Americas. And I'm not just talking about Republicans and Democrats here, though that division largely mirrors the real divide.

Your old road is
Rapidly aging
Please get out of the new one
If you can't lend a hand
For the times they are a-changin'
- Bob Dylan, The Times They Are A-Changin'


We know that throughout history conservatives have constantly fought tooth and nail against equality and justice? But the question remains, why? Could it be a sickness?

What's up with conservatives anyway? Time after time they have been shown to have been on the wrong side of history, standing strong, tall and proud against justice, equality and progress. Yet in the present they always seem to stubbornly cling to their bankrupt way of thinking, as they insist on opposing all progressive change, whatever it may be. Of course today's typical conservative wouldn't defend slavery or deny women the vote, but, in the end, it's the same mindset and, without a doubt, today's conservatives, had they been around back in the day, would have supported the status quo then, just as they do today. The conservative mind remains the same, it's just the topics under discussion that change.

You've all heard of The Axis Of Evil, of course, but what about The Axis of Medieval? Because, man, has it ever been a great week for them! In fact, it's been an amazing week for all admirers of the Dark Ages and all fans of Medieval systems, techniques and mindsets. First there was the report out of Saudi Arabia the other day about the Saudi Arabian "witch" being sentenced to death for, uh, "casting spells" on some guy, then there was this buffoon in the White House threatening to veto a Senate bill outlawing torture, and, finally, there was the start of the show trials for some of the most prominent tortured inmates at the Guantanamo Bay gulag. Truly a great week for Medieval lovers everywhere.

or Iran vs Saudi Arabia in "The Ascendancy of Asininity"

Ok, so two weeks ago you heard about the delightful tale of the 19-year-old woman in Saudi Arabia who, for the crime of being gang-raped, was sentenced to be tortured and permanently disfigured - to call flogging by its real name - followed by 6 months in prison. Well, today we're reminded that, when it comes to full-on barbaric, feudal, Dark Age Mentalities, the Saudis are relatively timid and moderate compared to their brothers in asininity in the Iranian judiciary. I can almost hear the Iranian taunts now: "Hey, Saudis, you call that a sentence? How about death to an 18-year-old for the crime of being raped by her brothers and forced into sex slavery by her parents? Bet you can't beat that, you pansies!"

What a lovely country that Saudi Arabia is. Check out this BBC article about a 19-year-old woman who is not only going to prison for being gang-raped, but is also facing 200 lashes.

Yes, 6 months in prison and a good whipping till all the skin has been ripped off her back, all for the crime of being gang-raped.

Ok, people, this is Absolutely F*cking Brilliant!!!! Talk about speaking some truth, talk about telling it like it is! It just doesn't get much better than this.

Who are these people? Seriously, who are they? How can poll after poll tell us that between 32 and 38% of Americans are happy with Bush's performance as president? How is it possible for anyone to be so far gone that they somehow still think that Bush, Sidekick Dick and all the other buffoons in the White House are actually doing a great job?

It was great to learn this past week that homophobia actually has a good productive side. And it was truly great to see some fundamentalist freaks coming together in a show of solidarity. A solidarity of hatred, that is. I'm talking, of course, about the coming together in common cause of Jewish, Christian and Muslim fundamentalists in Jerusalem earlier this week to oppose that city's Gay Pride March. I mean, isn't it wonderful to see people putting their hatred aside to unite for the purposes of... er... hatred? Hatred of others though, rather than of each other. How special.

We all know who is ultimately responsible for the total and utter catastrophe that Iraq has become since being unjustly and illegally invaded and occupied three and a half years ago; I mean, the whole world knows who is ultimately guilty for the horrendous ongoing carnage and wholesale destruction in and of that country; but let's talk for a moment about some other immoral bastards. Specifically, what's with these psychopaths in Iraq torturing and murdering hundreds of innocent people a month for no other reason than they happen to belong to the other side of the sectarian divide (Shia or Sunni). Not only are these death squads slaughtering completely innocent civilians on a daily basis, but, before senselessly killing them, they're actually torturing these people for absolutely no other reason than hatred. Torture, not for information or any other purpose, just for psychotic pleasure, it would seem.