George W. Bush
I'm a loser, I'm a loser,
And I'm not what I appear to be
- The Beatles (written by John Lennon), "I'm A Loser"
Is it just me or are the Democrats a pathetic bunch of losers who are too spineless to stand up forcefully for anything they believe in?
One thing I think everyone can agree on is the fact that this past decade has had more than its fair share of dicks. While almost everyone can agree on the dickishness of certain slimy characters out there, certain others inexplicably have their passionate defenders.
To my mind, however, over the past ten years quintessential dickishness has been defined by a select few.
So here it is, my list of the Biggest Dicks of The Decade:
- "There's no doubt in my mind, not one doubt in my mind, that we will fail." - Oct. 4, 2001. George W. Bush, in Washington, D.C., remarking on a back-to-work plan after 9-11, though, of course, he just as easily could have been talking about his entire presidency.
Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
Before they're allowed to be free?
Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head,
Pretending he just doesn't see?
Bob Dylan, "Blowin' In The Wind"
What's going on in Gaza right now is so incredibly tragic and unjust, not to mention unbelievably brutal and barbaric.
But I'm not here to discuss how it is we came to this horrific situation. No, that has been written about much more eloquently by others, people such as Avi Shlaim, an Oxford professor of international relations and an Israeli himself. I'd strongly recommend that everyone read his recent piece "How Israel brought Gaza to the brink of humanitarian catastrophe". It's a definite must-read for anyone wanting to really understand this conflict and the whole long, sordid tale of Israel's brutal treatment of the Palestinian people.
Seemingly intent on proving every last word of my recent rant (Fear and Loathing in The Heartland: Republicans' Lovefest With Ignorance) to be true and factual, senior aides to John McCain have been leaking details about Sarah Palin and, man, are they ever doozies! If these reports are true, she's somehow even worse than she seemed in those Katie Couric interviews.
I must say, I fully appreciate these McCain aides backing up my theory about Republicans being completely infatuated, if not downright in love, with stupidity. However, I'm still a little confused by their motives.
Tears of Joy
Do you really need to hear one more person tell you that last night was a historic night? I think not. But I'm going to say it anyway, because how else can you describe such a monumental event as seeing a black man elected as president of the United States just 40 short years after civil rights workers were being beaten, tortured and murdered down in the Deep South.
I can tell you right now that I've never before shed tears while watching an election result. I did, most certainly, cry tears of joy when Nelson Mandela was finally freed from prison back in 1990, but I've never cried for some regular event like an election. Not until last night. But this, obviously, wasn't an ordinary election.
The New French
You know how John McCain said he might not talk to the Spanish government if he's elected president? How, in an interview last month, he lumped Spanish Prime Minister Jose Luis Zapatero in with anti-American leaders such as Venezuela's Hugo Chavez and the Castro Brothers of Cuba?
Well, what I want to know is, does that make the Spanish the new French? And, if so, does that mean that this year all truly patriotic (i.e. idiotic) Americans will have to start calling their favorite aphrodisiac Freedom Fly, a la those Freedom Fries of French-hating days gone by? And, what I really want to know is this, will Freedom Fly still get you as horny as its American-hating cousin, Spanish Fly?
Uncle Ron and The Deregulators
Once upon a time, way back in the 1980s, some seemingly intelligent people (economics professors at the Chicago School of Economics, led by Milton Friedman, for instance) and some not particularly intelligent people (Ronald Reagan, for one) agreed something had to be done. Their nation was suffering under the chains of regulation and the tyranny of oversight and, like some sort of Charles Bronson-Chuck Norris deregulatory tag team, they were going to save it and they didn't care who got hurt in the process.
It seems that fifty years earlier, way way back in the 1930s, some socialists with funny sounding names like Keynes and Roosevelt had tried to fetter capitalism.
And, as everyone knows, to fetter capitalism is to fetter freedom. And to fetter freedom is to fetter the American way of life.
Driving, according to the Bush Administration, is the newest war crime. Yes, war crime.
Obviously, things have been quite farcical in the Land of Bush and Dick (Cheney) for years now, but it would seem that, as of the past week, they've actually reached a whole new level of lunacy.
At a monkey trial down there in Guantanamo Bay, at the infamous Land Of Freedom Gulag, some guy named Salim Hamdan was just found guilty of war crimes for driving Osama bin Laden around from 1997 to 2001. I'm not making this up.
Your old road is
Please get out of the new one
If you can't lend a hand
For the times they are a-changin'
- Bob Dylan, The Times They Are A-Changin'
We know that throughout history conservatives have constantly fought tooth and nail against equality and justice? But the question remains, why? Could it be a sickness?
What's up with conservatives anyway? Time after time they have been shown to have been on the wrong side of history, standing strong, tall and proud against justice, equality and progress. Yet in the present they always seem to stubbornly cling to their bankrupt way of thinking, as they insist on opposing all progressive change, whatever it may be. Of course today's typical conservative wouldn't defend slavery or deny women the vote, but, in the end, it's the same mindset and, without a doubt, today's conservatives, had they been around back in the day, would have supported the status quo then, just as they do today. The conservative mind remains the same, it's just the topics under discussion that change.